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Stepping out of victimhood means freedom

Stepping out of victim mentality means freedom to become the real you. Staying the victim holds you back from achieving your goals and dreams.

What victim mentality is

Vicky Botnick a licensed marriage and family therapist (LMFT) in Tarzana, California, explains that people identify with the victim role when they “veer into the belief that everyone else caused their misery and nothing they do will ever make a difference.”

The misery

For many years I had this victim mentality. I came from the third generation of single Moms through the death of the husbands. Alone, struggling with raising kids by myself. T his is just how it will always be. A struggle financially, emotionally and physically. Bitterness and resentment. Other people get the better hand of cards just not me. My house was a broken mess. I don’t have a husband to fix and provide. This is a curse. Three generations.

Light bulb moment

In 2010 I had difficult swallowing and in 2011 I was diagnosed with Achalasia a swallowing disorder.. It was while lying in ICU that I made a promise to God and to myself. I would fight to live and then change my mindset, my life. I would move out of the victim mentality I became so accustomed to.

Stepping out of victim mentality means freedom

I can see clearly now

Ten years later and I cannot believe the change in myself. Others notice it too. I no longer see myself as a victim. Rather a survivor. A winner. No more bitterness and resentment. I renovated my whole house by myself with tutorials I found on the Internet. Financially independent. No more feeling sorry for myself. Making the best of every day.

How I did it

Dr. Phil’s books Self matters and Life strategies was my starting point. I went to a Psychologist and still sees her on a monthly basis. Meditation and Prayers. Basic exercises. Doing my own maintenance on my home. Removing physical clutter out of my home. Living mindfully. Changing my thought processes. Challenging the false believes of victimhood.

I am free now and so can you. Stand up, step out and walk onto the winning podium